Finding the Right Legal Team
How to choose solicitors, barristers and support that understand domestic abuse, coercive control and safeguarding.
The right legal team can protect you and your children. The wrong one can minimise abuse, push you to settle unsafely, or tell you “this is just how it is”.
Not every solicitor, barrister or advisor understands domestic abuse, coercive control, trauma or the realities of family and criminal courts for victims.
This page helps you work out what you need, what to ask, and how to recognise red flags so you can build a legal team that actually fights for your safety.
1VAA does not replace legal advice. We help you find, brief and work with the right professionals.
Who Can Be in Your Legal Team?
Your “legal team” may include:
- Family law solicitors – for child arrangements, non-molestation orders, occupation orders and other private law disputes
- Criminal solicitors – where there are criminal charges, police investigations or breaches of orders
- Barristers / counsel – who represent you at hearings and trials (often instructed by your solicitor)
- Domestic abuse specialists – IDVAs, specialist workers, advocates
- Supporters / McKenzie Friends – where you are in person or need additional help in court
You may not need all of these at once. The key is to choose people who understand abuse dynamics and child safeguarding, not just procedure.
What to Look For in a Legal Professional
When you are choosing a solicitor or barrister, look for:
- Experience with domestic abuse and coercive control – not just “family law” in general
- Understanding of safeguarding – PD12J, risk, trauma, child welfare principles
- Willingness to challenge poor practice – social care, Cafcass, police, experts
- Respectful, trauma-informed communication – you should feel heard, not blamed
- Clear explanation style – they can explain options in plain language
- Strategic thinking – not just reacting to each hearing without a plan
You are allowed to ask direct questions about their knowledge and approach before you decide to instruct them.
Questions to Ask Before You Instruct Someone
Some questions you can ask in an initial consultation:
- “How much experience do you have with domestic abuse and coercive control cases?”
- “What is your approach when social services or Cafcass minimise abuse?”
- “How do you handle cases where my child is saying they feel unsafe?”
- “What do you think are the key risks and strengths in my case as I’ve described it?”
- “How will you communicate with me? How often can I expect updates?”
- “Are you confident challenging professionals and experts if they get it wrong?”
- “What are my realistic options and what would you prioritise first?”
Their answers, tone and attitude will tell you a lot.
Red Flags in Legal Representation
Be cautious if a legal professional:
- Dismisses domestic abuse or coercive control as “just relationship conflict”
- Tells you to “stop talking about abuse” because it will “annoy the court”
- Pressures you to agree unsafe contact arrangements without proper risk assessment
- Refuses to challenge social workers, Cafcass, GAL or experts even when there is clear evidence of mistakes
- Makes you feel to blame for the abuse
- Speaks over you, ignores your evidence or minimises your child’s disclosures
- Does not read your papers or prepare until the last minute
- Does not explain your options or asks you to sign things you do not understand
If you feel consistently unsafe, unheard or pressured into unsafe decisions, it may be time to seek a second opinion.
Legal Aid, Private and Mixed Arrangements
Your options may depend on your finances, evidence of abuse, and the type of case:
- Legal aid – may be available for non-molestation orders, some child cases and public law (care proceedings), especially where there is evidence of domestic abuse or risk
- Private funding – paying privately for a solicitor or barrister, sometimes with fixed fees for certain hearings
- Mixed approach – getting advice on key points or specific hearings while handling other parts yourself
1VAA can help you think through how best to use limited funds strategically, if full representation is not possible at every stage.
How to Brief Your Legal Team Effectively
Even the best legal representative can only work with what they understand. You can help them help you by providing:
- A clear chronology highlighting key incidents and dates
- A concise summary of risk and abuse (what the perpetrator has done, pattern of behaviour)
- Your incident log and key evidence (organised, not hundreds of random screenshots)
- Copies of court orders, assessments, social care and school documents
- Any SAR disclosures that show system failings or contradictory information
- A clear statement of what you want to achieve (contact arrangements, safety measures, orders)
1VAA can help you prepare a short briefing pack so your legal team gets a clear picture from the start instead of trying to piece things together last minute.
If You Cannot Get a Solicitor Right Now
Some parents cannot find a solicitor, are refused legal aid, or lose representation mid-case.
If this happens:
- You can still attend court as a litigant in person
- You may bring a McKenzie Friend for quiet support (subject to the judge’s approval)
- You can request reasonable adjustments if you are a victim of abuse or have a disability
- You can still use your evidence file, chronology and documents to present your case
1VAA can help you:
- Prepare position statements and key documents
- Organise your bundle and core evidence
- Understand hearings and orders in plain language
How 1VAA Helps You Find and Work With a Legal Team
As a 1VAA member, you can access:
- Guidance on what kind of legal support you need at each stage
- Checklists of questions to ask when choosing a solicitor or barrister
- Support preparing your briefing pack and evidence file
- Help understanding legal advice and court documents
- Support challenging poor representation or seeking a second opinion
- Connections with trusted professionals where appropriate (we do not take referral fees)
Our role is to help you build a legal team that understands abuse, believes your children and puts safeguarding first.
If You Need Help Right Now
If you feel let down by your current solicitor, are struggling to find someone who understands abuse, or are facing court alone, you do not have to navigate this by yourself.
Register for support or join 1VAA and we will help you work out what you need and how to get the right people on your side.