Contacting the Police

How to report abuse safely — and what to say when you need immediate protection for yourself or your children.

Calling the police can be frightening, especially if you have been ignored, minimised or blamed in the past. But the police are often the first line of protection in domestic abuse, stalking, child safeguarding and coercive control cases.

This page explains when and how to contact the police, what to expect when you do, and how to protect yourself in situations where police response is inconsistent or unsafe.

You deserve to be taken seriously. Your children deserve safety. And you are allowed to ask for help.

When Should You Contact the Police?

You should call the police when you or your children are at risk or have experienced:

Physical assault or threats of violence
Stalking, harassment or monitoring
Coercive or controlling behaviour
Sexual assault or sexual coercion
Child abuse or disclosures from a child
Breaches of non-molestation orders, restraining orders or bail
Criminal damage, intimidation or threats to kill

If you feel unsafe, trust your instincts. You do not need “proof” before you call.

How to Contact the Police

There are different ways to contact the police depending on danger level:

999 – Immediate danger, violence, threats, or a crime in progress.
101 – Non-emergency reporting, follow-up information, ongoing harassment.
Online reporting – For coercive control, stalking, harassment, repeated messages, breaches, or evidence submissions.
Silent Solution (999 + 55) – If you cannot speak safely, press 55 when prompted.

Always give the operator:

Your location
Whether children are present
Whether weapons, alcohol or mental health risks are involved

What to Say When You Call

Be clear, factual and direct. For example:

“I am afraid for my safety.”
“I believe my partner/ex is going to harm me.”
“This is part of an ongoing pattern of abuse.”
“My child has disclosed abuse.”
“There is a breach of a court order / bail condition.”

You do not need to give your entire story on the call — focus on immediate danger.

What the Police Should Do When You Report

Police are required to:

Record a crime or incident
Complete a DASH risk assessment
Check for history, previous incidents and safeguarding concerns
Take statements and evidence
Consider arrest or protective measures
Issue safeguarding referrals for children
Provide a reference number

If they do not do these things, it is a systemic failure — not a reflection of you.

If the Police Do Not Listen or Minimise the Abuse

This is common and deeply damaging. You may hear:

“It’s a civil matter.”
“There’s nothing we can do.”
“There’s no evidence.”

If this happens:

Ask for the officer’s collar number
Ask for the report or incident to be logged
State calmly: “I want this recorded as domestic abuse under the Domestic Abuse Act.”
Request a supervising sergeant if necessary
Keep your own record of the call and response

1VAA can help you challenge poor police practice, escalate failures and understand your rights.

Evidence to Have Ready (If Safe)

You do not need evidence before calling the police, but it helps to have:

Dates, times and locations
Screenshots, messages or recordings
Injuries or property damage photos
Children’s disclosures (recorded factually, not coached)
Court orders or bail conditions

Store evidence safely and do not confront the abuser about it.

How Contacting the Police Affects Family Court

Reporting abuse can:

Trigger safeguarding action
Support a risk-based approach to contact
Lead to fact-finding hearings
Challenge false accusations of “alienation”

However, police inaction is often misinterpreted by family courts as a sign that “risk is low”. 1VAA helps you explain these systemic failings clearly.